![]() It’s the time of year I get shouted at the most. Hurray! Spring has arrived, so Tbilisi’s gardeners are filling the parks’ flowerbeds with red woodchip mulch again. Hurray! Which means they shout at me when Manchee goes over to do his business on them.* Yay! The woodchips are to combat weeds by sucking up nitrogen. (So, the reason weeds grow better than flowers is that weeds are nitro-powered, apparently.) Dogs also go mad for those woodchips. Visitors to Tbilisi in spring are often terrified of the stray dogs at first, because the dogs walk around stained in red, like they’re paid-up members of the sinister Blood City cult. But they’re not. They just like to sleep on the red woodchips and the colour rubs off. You see? There’s a rational explanation for everything. Even for the plague of rats terrorising Hawkinge-By-Hythe, after a powerful witch promises revenge… Find out what it is in The Phoenix right here! Chat soon, Morgan P.S. More Morgan? Get 2 of my books free here: morgandelaney.info/newsletter *Doing his business on the woodchips, not on the gardeners. He’s a good boy. |
Trusted by 500+ fans to find the fun in the funereal, the absurd in the macabre, and delight in the darkness. Join fiction author Morgan Delaney three times a week for genre-bending stories of cozy horror, dark fantasy and a brain with mind of its own...
Poe did more than just write fiction, you know. He was one of America’s leading literary critics, as well as being interested in physics and cosmology. And he was almost certainly the first man in America to use the CRISPR gene-editing technology. Right? I couldn’t believe it at first either, but it says so on Wikipedia. Look: You see? First he became editor of the Journal, and then he became editor of its owner. I found that while researching Poe again this week. I’d researched him before...
Have you looked at a washing machine recently? We’ll need a new one when we move countries, and the last one we bought was maybe in 2013 in Australia. So, at the weekend I spent an hour tentatively dipping my toe into the shopping pool to see how warm the water is, and HOLY MOLY! You can buy washing machines with AI now! I was so excited. Imagine. A washing machine that’ll wander around the house picking up washing, sorting it into piles, washing it and hanging it up for us! But when I read...
great news! In fact, great newses, because I have two! The first one will come as a relief to everyone who’s been struggling to keep up with the tsunami of nonsense on YouTube, etc. I’ve been posting five videos of nonsense (but top-notch nonsense, if I do say so myself) every week for the last six weeks for a challenge. Now that I’ve won the challenge, I’m dialling it back to three a week, in response to urgent warnings by brain specialists that humanity can’t take it much longer. In future,...