![]() My mother didn’t have it easy. She didn’t even have a sense of smell. And while the rest of 1980s Ireland had miraculous moving statues, we made do with mysterious margarine. Back in those days, butter was bad and margarine was good, so young Morgan et al. all ate margarine. Sometimes my breakfast toast tasted fine with it. Some mornings the margarine was weird. A brand new tub. Just opened the previous night. I had put it on my evening toast. My mother had put it on her evening potatoes. No problems. Now it tasted yuck. It stumped me every time it happened. Good margarine. Toast and potatoes. Bad margarine. I couldn’t ask my mother for help. She had no sense of smell, remember, and that messed with her sense of taste, too. That’s why she added garlic to her potatoes and margarine. Aha! Look, I understand about garlic, now, but I still don’t know where she even found the garlic back then. Yes, my mother was a double-dipper. Going in for margarine, rubbing it over the garlic on her spuds. Then going in for more with the same knife. Making it taste strange if you weren’t expecting garlic-flavoured margarine. So, the dark mystery was solved, and Mum’s up there now, spreading margarine with the angels. It’s time to forgive her for her margarine mind tricks. But you won’t forgive yourselves if you miss out on 50% off loads of my books – and The Phoenix for free.
The Smashwords sale is over but you can still get two more free ebooks from me here! Chat soon, Morgan Get 2 free ebooks from Morgan here: morgandelaney.info/newsletter. |
Trusted by 500+ fans to find the fun in the funereal, the absurd in the macabre, and delight in the darkness. Join fiction author Morgan Delaney three times a week for genre-bending stories of cozy horror, dark fantasy and a brain with mind of its own...
Poe did more than just write fiction, you know. He was one of America’s leading literary critics, as well as being interested in physics and cosmology. And he was almost certainly the first man in America to use the CRISPR gene-editing technology. Right? I couldn’t believe it at first either, but it says so on Wikipedia. Look: You see? First he became editor of the Journal, and then he became editor of its owner. I found that while researching Poe again this week. I’d researched him before...
Have you looked at a washing machine recently? We’ll need a new one when we move countries, and the last one we bought was maybe in 2013 in Australia. So, at the weekend I spent an hour tentatively dipping my toe into the shopping pool to see how warm the water is, and HOLY MOLY! You can buy washing machines with AI now! I was so excited. Imagine. A washing machine that’ll wander around the house picking up washing, sorting it into piles, washing it and hanging it up for us! But when I read...
great news! In fact, great newses, because I have two! The first one will come as a relief to everyone who’s been struggling to keep up with the tsunami of nonsense on YouTube, etc. I’ve been posting five videos of nonsense (but top-notch nonsense, if I do say so myself) every week for the last six weeks for a challenge. Now that I’ve won the challenge, I’m dialling it back to three a week, in response to urgent warnings by brain specialists that humanity can’t take it much longer. In future,...